Dave Grohl fans feel 'betrayed' as he admits fathering baby outside his marriage

Kate Ng
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - FEBRUARY 05: (FOR EDITORIAL USE ONLY) (L-R) Harper Grohl, Jordyn Blum, Dave Grohl, Ophelia Grohl, and Violet Grohl attend the 65th GRAMMY Awards at Crypto.com Arena on February 05, 2023 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic)
Dave Grohl, pictured here with his wife Jordyn Blum and daughters (L-R) Harper, Ophelia and Violet, revealed he has fathered a child outside his marriage in a shock statement. (Getty Images) (FilmMagic)

Foo Fighters fans have expressed their shock after frontman Dave Grohl released a statement on Tuesday 10 September announcing he has fathered a baby girl born "outside my marriage".

The 55-year-old, who has been married to wife Jordyn Blum since 2003, shared the revelation in an Instagram post and said he plans "to be a loving and supportive parent" to his new child.

He added: "I love my wife and my children, and am doing everything I can to regain their trust and earn their forgiveness."

Grohl and Blum share three daughters, Violet Maye, 19, Harper Willow, 16, and Ophelia Saint, 11. Throughout their marriage, Grohl has praised Blum, describing her as the "queen of my world" in his 2021 memoir, The Storyteller. He added: "She showed me a future. Together, we created my life’s greatest achievement, my family."

He did not disclose the identity of the mother of his new child and turned off comments on his Instagram account. Grohl’s two oldest daughters have deactivated their social media accounts following the news.

attends The 57th Annual GRAMMY Awards at the STAPLES Center on February 8, 2015 in Los Angeles, California.
Dave Grohl and Jordyn Blum have been married since 2003. This is his second marriage; his first was to Jennifer Leigh Youngblood from 1994 to 1997. (Getty Images) (WireImage)

The former Nirvana drummer was previously married to photographer Jennifer Leigh Youngblood. They wed in 1994 and divorced in 1997, after he confessed he cheated on her.

Following his statement, fans have flocked to social media platform X, formerly Twitter, and TikTok to voice their feelings about the news. Many spoke of how "betrayed" they felt by Grohl, who has frequently been branded "the nicest guy in rock".

One person wrote: "How dare you betray my trust, Dave Grohl. You were a God in my eyes."

Another said: "Have never felt deeper parasocial betrayal than Dave Grohl cheating on his wife."

Reflecting on Grohl’s status as a rare "nice guy" in the rock music scene, a third added: "Out of every rock band frontman you’d expect to cheat on their wives and have a baby outside their marriage… Dave Grohl is at the bottom of everyone’s list. Not his teenage daughters deactivating their socials too."

On TikTok, one fan shared a video of herself looking disapprovingly at a life-sized cutout of Grohl she appears to own. Over the video, she shared a message that read: "Never idolising anyone again."

In a comment under the video, one TikTok user lamented: "I’m so unbelievably disappointed, he was my hero and I’m literally so upset he would do this."

Some fans have wondered why news of Grohl’s fourth child, born outside his marriage, has hit them so hard. "Why do I feel personally betrayed by Dave Grohl?" one X user wondered, with hundreds of reposts from people wondering the same thing.

Georgina Sturmer, counsellor, MBACP, explains that these feelings stem from the 'parasocial relationships' that fans often form with their favourite celebrities. These are one-sided relationships that occur among audiences who invest emotional energy and time in media personas.

"There are so many threads and relationships connecting us with the people in our lives," she tells Yahoo UK. "And this isn’t just the people we see regularly. It’s also the individuals who feature in the public consciousness; the celebrities, the musicians, the sporting stars, the familiar faces on our screens.

"These 'parasocial relationships' give us a sense of connection and investment in their lives and behaviour. This can mean that when we hear news about their lives, it can have a real impact on our emotions."

<<enter caption here>> at LACMA on November 3, 2018 in Los Angeles, California.
Fans have been left feeling 'disappointed' in Dave Grohl, pictured here with wife Jordyn Blum, following his statement. (Getty Images) (Getty Images)

In the past couple of decades, social media has become a much more entrenched part of our lives and with that, fans have been able to connect with celebrities more intimately than ever before.

This new level of access to celebrities means that we have a "steady flow of images, videos, words and opinions", says Sturmer, compared to the past when fans only connected to their favourite personalities through their work and the stories they chose to offer to the media.

However, this has also meant that celebrities are being put on a pedestal, which exacerbates feelings of joy, sadness, excitement and disappointment whenever they do something. Sturmer says it can "make our sense of disappointment or anger even deeper if we feel as if they have behaved in a way that we deem to be inappropriate or unacceptable".

She adds: "With celebrities, this is amplified by the fact that we sometimes expect them to be less flawed or somehow less human than the people in our lives."

Information spreads so quickly across social media now that we hear about every little detail of our favourite celebrities' lives almost as soon as they happen. This also means that the voices of "critics, naysayers and even trolls" have been amplified, as people react immediately.

"The disinhibition effect of social media can mean that we are more likely to criticise and openly pass judgement," Sturmer says. "And on social media, we often find support for our critical view, which helps us to feel vindicated."

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