How to know if your child is ready to holiday alone as Kirstie Allsopp sparks debate

Marie-Claire Dorking
Updated
Kirstie Allsopp has sparked a parenting debate after allowing her 15-year-old son to travel on his own. (Getty Images)
Kirstie Allsopp has sparked a parenting debate after allowing her 15-year-old son to travel on his own. (Getty Images) (Jeff Spicer via Getty Images)

TV star Kirstie Allsopp has sparked a debate about the age children should holiday alone after sharing that her 15-year-old son took an inter-railing trip through Europe this summer with his 16-year-old friend.

Earlier this week she revealed on X that her son had recently returned from his travels. "My little boy has returned from 3 weeks inter-railing, he’ll be 16 on Wednesday so he went with a mate who’s already 16 due to hostel/travel restrictions.

"They organised the whole thing; Paris, Brussels, Amsterdam, Berlin, Munich, Marseille, Toulouse, Barcelona & Madrid," she wrote.

"For obvious budget reasons inter-railing isn’t on the cards for everyone, but in this increasingly risk averse world it’s vital that we find any ways we can to give our children the confidence that only comes from trusting them.

"Of course I missed spending the summer with our son, but I’m so proud of him & my loss is nothing compared to his gain & the encyclopaedic knowledge he now has of the differences between one McDonalds & another. If we’re afraid our children will also be afraid, if we let go, they will fly."

The Location, Location, Location presenter also appeared on BBC Radio 4's Today programme discussing her decision to let him go.

"He’s a very sensible young man," she said. "He’s never been in trouble at school, so when he said he wanted to do this I thought: ‘Right, OK, good on you.’"

While some raised concerns about Allsopp's son being old enough for such an adventure without adult supervision, others praised the TV presenter for nurturing her teenager's independence.

Parents find it difficult to know when to allow their children to travel alone. (Getty Images)
Parents find it difficult to know when to allow their children to travel alone. (Getty Images) (Getty)

So how do parents know when is the right time to let children travel alone?

"Determining the right moment to allow your child to venture on a holiday alone is a nuanced decision that requires a deep understanding of their psychological and emotional development," says psychologist and relationship adviser, Barbara Santini.

"It's a significant parental challenge to balance the natural protective instincts with the need to foster independence in your child."

Santini says the key to navigating this complex decision-making process is focusing on maturity markers and individual readiness rather than fixed age milestones.

"One of the fundamental aspects to assess is the child's ability to handle unexpected situations," she says.

"Unlike adults, children and adolescents may not fully possess the cognitive skills to manage emergencies or complex social interactions independently. Therefore, the readiness for a solo holiday significantly hinges on their problem-solving skills, experience navigating unfamiliar environments, and ability to adhere to safety guidelines without direct supervision."

Additionally, emotional maturity plays a crucial role.

"A child who can regulate their emotions effectively, communicate needs clearly, and maintain self-discipline in various settings may be more prepared for independent travel," Santini continues.

"Parents can gauge these traits through everyday observations and by providing gradually increasing responsibilities that simulate the demands of solo travel."

Experts recommend testing children's readiness before granting permission to travel alone. (Getty Images)
Experts recommend testing children's readiness before granting permission to travel alone. (Getty Images) (Getty)

Santini has put together some guidelines and tips for parents considering this step.

Start with structured settings

Before allowing a full solo holiday, test their readiness through supervised trips, such as school excursions or short stays with family members in different cities. "These experiences can serve as a safe trial run," Santini explains.

Assess decision-making skills

Engage your child in planning family activities or managing certain aspects of home life to observe their decision-making prowess. "This approach provides practical insights into their ability to handle larger responsibilities," Santini adds.

Implement a safety and communication strategy

Discuss and rehearse what to do in various scenarios, from losing a wallet to handling health issues. "Make sure your child is comfortable with communication tools and set clear guidelines on how often and through what means they should check in," Santini says.

Cultural and legal considerations

If the holiday involves travelling to another country, it's crucial to educate them about cultural norms and legal expectations there, which can differ significantly from home.

"By addressing these areas, you can better determine when your child might be ready to take the step towards holidaying alone, ensuring they do so safely and confidently," Santini adds.

Group of teenagers travelling alone. (Getty Images)
How young is too young for children to travel alone? (Getty Images) (Getty)

If your child is travelling abroad the laws are different depending on which country they are visiting. For example, according to Gov.UK children aged 17 and under travelling to Portugal alone must either: be met at the airport or point of entry by their parent or guardian. carry a letter of authorisation to travel from their parent or guardian.

Other countries, such as Spain and Greece, are more lenient but it is advisable to check with the country’s embassy before booking.

If your child plans to fly it is worth checking with the airline as they all have different rules when it comes to under-18s travelling without their parents.

Advertisement