From rat-spotting to a stroll on the M25: readers’ weirdest dates
In her new memoir, Diane Abbott describes her outings with Jeremy Corbyn during their brief romance in the late-70s. One date involved a memorable visit to Highgate cemetery.
Once, after I lamented our lack of social activity as a couple, he pondered it for a few days and told me we were going out. Feeling excited, I dressed up nicely and we bundled into the car. I had no idea where we were going – perhaps a nice wine bar? It turned out Jeremy’s idea of a social outing was to drive me to Highgate cemetery and proudly show me the tomb of Karl Marx.
We asked readers for their own stories of memorable dates in unexpected places. Here are some of your responses.
‘He suggested we see some rats – I thought he was joking’
Twenty years ago I was working as an investment banking lawyer in London when I met a guy while speed-dating. After a couple of dates in bars and restaurants, he invited me to visit where he lived, in Ilford. The following Saturday he met me at the train station. “So, what are we doing?” I asked. He responded by offering me two choices. We could do a survey on the high street about the state of Britain’s high streets, or we could see the rats at Valentines Park. I thought he was joking. I glanced at the high street and opted the for the park, thinking he wasn’t serious about the rats. We walked around a bit and eventually approached an area with a pond where he proclaimed: “How disappointing – there were a lot more rats here last week.” I don’t know what it says about me that I ended up marrying him. After dating a few banker/lawyer/city types, I guess he was a refreshing change! Anonymous, Melbourne
‘He took me to an exhibition of North Korean propaganda …’
I started talking with a very beautiful, tall Dutch man online and we agreed to go on a date. I said that I was very into cultural things and he suggested an exhibition he was keen to see. It turned out to be about the graphic design of North Korean propaganda. It was a very interesting and vibrant date, but I can’t stop thinking about this man without also thinking: “Let’s revolutionise the fishing industry.” The date was fun but we did not meet again. Alex, York
‘We narrowly avoided a security guard’
My third date with my now wife back in 2010 was an undercover daytime exploration of the old abandoned mental asylum complex that used to be near Hellingly in East Sussex. The site was earmarked for demolition and we were curious to see what it would reveal after being abandoned in the early noughties. We reached the site through the woods in winter, entering through one of the hospital wings and explored the corridors, wrecked wards, washrooms and the large central hall. After narrowly avoiding a patrolling security guard with a dog, we made a run for it. I don’t think we’ve ever quite managed to replicate the experience of fear, adrenaline and romantic tension since. We had a pint to steady our nerves in a nearby pub afterwards. The place felt thick with sadness and a weight from all the generations of people who must have been locked up there. Our subsequent dates were a bit more lighthearted. Sam, Brighton
‘I made my excuses and got the DLR home’
A Bumble first date once asked to meet at a Christmas feminist zine fair in east London. When we arrived at the location for the fair, it turned out he had got both the date, time and venue completely wrong. We went to a caff round the corner in Poplar for a sad cup of coffee instead as there were no nearby pubs. The date didn’t go well – it lasted about 25 minutes, during which he professed his belief that Twitter was “the future of e-marketing” (it was 2017). I made my excuses and got the DLR home. Charlotte, 29, London
‘He took me to the river behind the dog racing track in Sheffield’
For our first date my partner took me to the river behind the dog racing track in Sheffield. When he picked me up in his car and drove me to the ropey side of town I joked he might be about to kidnap me. Luckily, I had my faithful Staffy, Arnie, with me. In fact, he helped me into a pair of waders and got me into the River Don. We then spent a couple of hours kick sampling and looking at river bugs. He used to enter the data into a national database to help monitor the health of the river. The first part of the date went so well that after that we changed out of the waders and drove to his local pub for pie and chips and a few pints. It was the best date I’ve ever been on. He’s quite shy – so it helped that he was in his element doing something he loves. Eight years and two children later, we’re still happily together, along with Arnie. Sarah, 40, Sheffield
‘We went via the divorce court’
About 10 years ago I was newly single and met someone through a dating site. By chance I’d already booked the following Thursday off work, while she worked four days a week. At short notice we agreed to meet for lunch in central Brum. I explained that I had an appointment at 2pm, but was a bit vague about where I needed to be – I was going to the divorce court to collect my decree absolute. This vagueness felt like it could become a bit of an issue; after all, I wouldn’t want to date a secretive person. So I told the truth. After a bit of laughter, she asked if she could come to my appointment with me so that we could carry on with the date afterwards … and that is how my second date included the divorce court. We didn’t become a forever couple, though I am now happily married. Anonymous, Birmingham
‘The venue was on fire’
For our first date Gillian and I planned to meet outside the famous Leeds Kirkgate Market before going on to a friend’s house. But there was a slight snag: when I got there it was on fire, one of the biggest blazes Leeds had ever seen. Although it was a mass of confusion with buses rerouted everywhere, we still bumped into each other a couple of streets away and got to our friend’s house. Years later, Gillian admitted she only agreed to go to the house because my friend had borrowed her copy of Elton John’s Goodbye Yellow Brick Road album and she wanted it back. We’ve been married for 47 years. Stephen Thompson, 70, Norfolk
‘We went to the newly finished M25’
When my husband of 38 years and I were dating in the early 80s, he took me to the newly finished but as yet unopened M25 near Brentwood. We walked on the carriageway amazed at the engineering and the size of the carriageways. It was eerily quiet. I don’t suppose we had any idea how busy that road would become. I do remember thinking it was an odd suggestion, and wondered if we were allowed to “trespass” on the unopened motorway. Perhaps not the most romantic date, but we are still together. Amanda, 65, Essex
